a little ramble for your day

So I have been making a mental list of things I wanted to blog about.

I finally have a moment to write- and I can't think of a single one.

figures

So I'll ramble a bit and see what comes of it.

We went to the zoo yesterday. My mom, my mother-in-law, my hubby and kids, my sister-in-law her hubby and kid, and my sister-in-law's husband's uncle's girlfriend/baby mamma and her kid. But really we are much closer than the ridiculous distance the title implies. The extended relative is actually younger than me by a few months. And it is not an eww factor because the bro-in-law's uncle is only a few years older than me. It is one of those funny things where the kids were way apart and one kid was born to a young mother...ect. It is a really complicated story, but none the less, we are all about the same age and at the same stage in life.

We all have young children. I cap them off with the oldest and the youngest.
Anyway- The zoo was tons of fun. It is definitely one of those places you only need to go to once every few years, and this was our second trip in 6 months. Last time it was just us and my mother and father-in-law. So it was all new to my sis-in-law and her son. We went to commemorate the first anniversary of his birth.  Which is a fancy pants way of saying we went for his birthday. lol
Thankfully my sis-I-L is not one of those who insists on seeing every single element and spending 30 min at each exhibit kind of people. Going to the zoo with an 18 month old and a 5 week old is EXHAUSTING. Especially when the newborn doesn't eat well. You know he makes with the pukey face sometimes. Well, a lot of times.
BUT that may be resolved. We are awaiting a prescription right now!

Back to work on Thursday- boo

I was looking forward to it. I have been sick for 2 weeks with a stubborn fiercely independent 18 month old who has been treading the terrible 2s for about 4 months now and a pukey baby- and my mom. I was READY to be out of the house- in the world of adults- meeting my students FINALLY.
But now that it is upon me, I am sad about it. A little sad that I am not going to be able to clean my kitchen slowly through out the day as the kid allows me, a little sad that I can't nap in the middle of the day. But mostly sad about leaving the boys. I really am enjoying being with them. I will miss snuggling after naps. I will miss him saying all sorts of new words now that he can hear. I will miss it.
Speaking of- he is up!

poop and ear drainage

So I knew boys would be gross- but really?

Baby boy did poop- YAY - and has not stopped.. boo. We had to go to Kayro syrup to make things move easier. Poor baby tore his little butt up trying to poop at his cousin's birthday. This was actually sad and terribly funny at the same time.
Baby boy does not cry unless he is hungry or wet. He really is just chill. Of course we spent the morning bragging about this fact. Then he starts wailing- and wailing- and wailing. So I go to change him (this is the kind of house and family that you just lay the pad down and change in the living room) and Little man decides he wants to help, by running away with the wipes. Ever the helper that one. There were 50 people in this house, and I am yelling at no one in particular- Stop that kid, he has the wipes. I received a bunch of HUH? looks as I desperately try to keep baby boy calm (lest he puke up his formula- again) and get someone's attention. Eventually Little man and his contraband were returned to me. As baby boy is having this terrible poop, my nephew's (quite young for the title of) great-grandmother (who is sufficiently sloshed)  leans over and wants to play 20 questions. Her opening line is "You make pretty babies- you really do." Thank you Grandma Kitty (yes that is her real name.) So was this one early too? Where did you have him? (she does not and has never lived in the state.) Is that the same place as your other one? How is he sleeping? How is he eating? Why is he crying? Are you going to try for a girl next? (the most popular question presented to me lately, by the way) Why not? You should try for a girl. How old are you? Oh you have plenty of time to have another one. **Insert baby crying and pooping the most gawd awful poop ever, hard as a rock. ** Do you guys live close to here? We just love getting to see your boys when we visit (who is this "we" she speaks of, she comes by herself, I guess it is a Royal "We".) (sweet just the same.) Oh I had better let you clean that up.
And she disappears as the pooping finishes.

In my head I was really irritated, but she was just trying to be nice, I really do love my sister-in-law's In-laws. They are so very nice, and treat my family just like family. We have been there several times, and every time we are greeted with hugs and good conversation. And of course a beer.

So boys and icky-ness.
Little man had tubes put in his ears today. I was super stressed. The whole procedure took a total of 10 minutes, but we were at the hosp. for 3 hrs. Super. It was a raging success. When we had the initial consultation the doc was on the fence because his ears were not infected at the time and his ear drums were just cloudy. This indicated some build up behind the ears, but not really bad. He said that the fall and winter were really bad for infections and he had a feeling this would get worse before it got better. So we decided to go for it. I was feeling hesitant. I mean we were about to spend over $1,200 for a procedure that we might not really need. But when the doc walked in after the surgery, he said the ears had gotten really bad since the consultation and pre-op check in. He said he cleaned ALOT of gunk out of both ear drums, so I am glad we had that taken care of for the little man. Now, we deal with the goop that will drain out of his ear. Bloody puss. yuck.

Honestly, that will be fine. It is the beach I am worried about. It is going to be a battle royale to get ear plugs in that kid, and a battle to get them to stay. I have a feeling sandy dirty fingers will be pulling them out- over and over...

We will see.

Girls and Boys

Last night was a girls night- it was FANTABULOUS

I drove out to a girlfriend's house to meet with her and another friend who is in from out of town. They are both preggers and just beautiful. And hilarious.
We laughed and enjoyed each other's company. We had a delicious meal and all this calmed my soul.

Baby boy has been sick, he has been throwing up his forumla. We went to see a GI doc and she has us on a new formula which is actually making a big difference. Now we just need a poop. We need a poop in a bad way. If he doesn't poop, he may have a thickening of the muscle that connects the stomach to the intestines. The solution to this thickening is surgery. BUT if he poops, it is not this muscle thing. So we are praying for a poop- soon.
Little man had an appt with the ENT today. They said I needed to bring him because it was the consultation for the surgery. That punk DID not need to be there. I filled out paper work- and chased his cranky butt around. And he was determined to spend as much time in time-out at possible. Time out in public is AWKWARD. Old people staring at you awkward. Receptionist staring at you awkward. Other parents staring at you awkward. just awkward.

I also had to go to the board of education to turn in my paper work so I don't get fired for taking 5 weeks off. Also I needed to add baby boy to the insurance, so that when all these doctors start billing for his existence we don't have to pay all of it. 

That was more time out fun also- Running away from me kind of time out. In front of the board of ed receptionist awkward. Previous principal awkward.

He came home and has been napping for 1 1/2 hr so far.. good plan.

video monitor madness!

So- more folly

My mom offered to buy baby boy a crib. I know that we get a coupon for items on our registry at babies-r-us, so I went ahead and registered for one. We got our coupon and headed to the store. We also purchased a video monitor.

We were all excited to see the see the antics that the little man would pull as he went to bed! Then he rolled over and went to sleep. like. a punk.

He was cute as he woke up. Well, I was asleep as he woke up until the hubby decided to wake me up for this historic moment. I shouldn't complain- it was cute.

So in Ga we are having a Tax free holiday on clothes and the like. I saved a ton of money Like. A. Boss. We stopped at Burlington after picking up our new crib. They have this good sized baby section. With stinking good prices. Including our monitor. shit. like $100 less good prices.. shit. So tomorrow , I get to trek back to over crowded, supper trafficked town, and return our monitor. Then drive down the road and buy it again. Thus saving $100, moral of the story- check out Burlington Coat Factory and Baby Depot FIRST.

On a slightly related note- we did get some serious entertainment from the monitor tonight. He danced, sang, clapped, rolled, traced the tree on the wall, whined, laughed and was generally cute.

Good News all around

Yesterday was a day of good news.
One of my besties is coming into town in a few weeks, and I am super psyched! I have missed her so much.
The hubby got a management position at a different library in our county. It is kind of a long story but the gist is as follows.

Manager at main branch wants to step down.
The hubby applies, but realizes another manager wants to move over to the main branch.
The hubby expresses interest at branch b, and is told that can be arranged.
Manager at branch b decides that she, in fact, does not want to move to main branch.
Hubby gets original job at main branch.

Hubby starts to stress. Can't blame him too much though. The main branch is a mess. Like. Hot. Mess. There are a lot of things that need to change and be "revamped." He needs to make a lot of changes over a long period of time, and he is nervous about the current staff being resistant.

The way all this has worked out, he is meant to be at the main branch. God is clearly putting him there, and He is going to do a lot through the hubby.

Other good news-

Consignment sale season is here!! Hitting the first one tomorrow with my sister in law and her husband's aunt. (Who is younger than me.) This one sounds like it is going to be a big one. It is in a store front, not in the church's gym like ours. It sounds like it is going to be good times.

My little man is getting more proficient with a fork. And by proficient I mean he has stopped trying to brush his hair with it.  He now makes vague stabbing motions with the fork into the food then brings it to his mouth with or with out food. I am impressed. I am also forced to endure the 30 minute eating sessions because this is the ONLY way he will eat his food. Mommy can not touch the food or fork in ANY way. It upsets the balance of the force apparently. But I am optimistic.

pumping iron

Not in the traditional sense of the phrase.
Sweet baby boy, just like his brother, refused to latch and breastfeed. Even the lactation specialist was dumbfounded and told me "just keep trying," as she gracefully bowed out. So I am relegated to spend about 6.5-7 hrs of my day and night pumping iron filled breast milk. I have presently re-read the Hunger Games series. I have also read The Life of Pi, a few of the Oz books, 2 glamor magazines, the latest National Geographic and Smithsonian, and every article on NPR's website. There has been a lot of solitaire on my phone. Then of course there is Netflix. I started Buffy the Vampire slayer from the beginning. I am in the middle of season 2.

I am doing this because it is the best option for my boy, but it is hell on me. It is hell on my sleep, my emotional state, my body and my time. I feel selfish for not liking it and secretly hoping for a genuine excuse to stop. I get nauseous and very tired when I pump. It is from oxytocin, it is "normal," just annoying, there is also the stomach cramps. Not my uterus cramping down to size, but full on crippling gas pains.   I know I wont stop, not until I get ready to go back to work, but that doesn't stop me from being slightly "over it."

I have been much more emotional this postpartum round. When my friends, mom, or husband is having a hard time, I feel myself getting sad and depressed for them. A girl from our area went missing yesterday, and I had a full on melt down thinking about the girl, especially her poor parents. I cried and cried. My mom is all stressed out, and her complaints super stressed me out and I cried over that.

I don't feel depressed, I have had plenty of that in my life, and I know how it feels. I just feel volatile. I haven't been snappy or angry, just like I am on the edge of a melt down. When I feel depressed, I just want to sleep, I don't want to clean, I don't want to talk, I just want to sleep. I don't have that now, just overly emotional responses.

I have every desire to love and hug my boys. I don't feel like not picking them up or ignoring them or God help, hurting them.  Well, maybe I want to spank Eli when he runs away from me laughing when I tell him he is going into time out for touching the TV- again. but I digress.

It is going to be a long 4 weeks until I go back to work. But I believe it will get better, I know it will.