playing grown up

Even as a kid- I knew grown ups had it hard. I had a keen sense that I had it good.

I did want to hit those milestones-
later bed time
learner's permit
job
driver's license
right to vote
legally drink

I knew that my parents hated paying bills, they were stressed over finances, and they had to take care of my aging grandfather.

There are things I never expected to encounter-
friends divorcing
friends loosing pregnancies
friends loosing children
friends committing suicide

The latter happened to me today. A friend from college. He was an acquaintance. If I ran into him at wal-mart we would spend 5 minutes catching up, and then move on. I was friends with him on facebook.

His wife gave birth to twin girls just a few months ago. He posted sooooo many pictures of those girls. So many.

He was a pastor at a church.

He shot himself in the head.

There are so many more tragedies I will encounter. I knew those things listed would happen- statistical inevitability, but I didn't realize I was the age when these things would start happening.

At what age do you stop playing grown up and become an actual grown up?
When you have children?
When you get married?
When you turn 29?
When you get a real job?

The first time you stop and realize you are a grown up.
I think that is the answer.
I had that today.

I have kids (almost 2 years.)
I have been married for 6 years.
I am 29- since October.
I have had a real job for 7 years. 

Today I am a grown up. What else comes with being a grown up? Friends with cancer. Friends dieing. Friends getting divorced.

But what else comes with it? The good- So much good.
Friends having sweet babies.
Triumphs and successes of our children.
Triumphs and successes of friend's children
Job promotions
New ventures
Books to be written
Dances to learn
smiles to be shared.

The good far out weighs the bad. Always remember this- The GOOD far outweighs the bad- ALWAYS.